One of the pieces of advice that my training incumbent tried to impress upon me when I was a curate in Swinton, South Yorkshire was ‘Father, never take on a church with a churchyard’, and he should know, being responsible for one of the largest open Churchyards in the Church of England. However, when I was asked by the Bishop to consider coming to Sidlesham four years or so ago, somehow’ Fr Barley's words got buried (if you'll pardon the pun). But in these last few months those wise words have been ringing in my ears.
We are blessed in Sidlesham with a beautiful rural churchyard which, I believe, is now the only open churchyard on the Manhood Peninsula. It is a beautiful and peaceful place, rich in its diverse range of flora and fauna. Overall, I think we achieve the delicate balance required between allowing the natural ecosystem to flourish while also ensuring that the space looks tended, safe, and loved. I am very grateful to the Churchyard Working Party, and to all the volunteers who give their time and energy to help with this work; without them, the churchyard simply could not be cared for as it is.
Let me explain why those words of advice have come back to me so forcefully. In common with many churchyards in the Chichester Diocese, Sidlesham has a Memorial Garden, an area set aside specifically for the interment of ashes, with each plot marked with a memorial stone, the earliest of which dates back over 50 years. A little while ago it was brought to my attention that laying memorial tablets in this way contravenes the Churchyard Regulations in the Diocese of Chichester, and that it is only allowed by virtue of a Faculty (that is, special permission from the Chancellor). Unfortunately, no such Faculty was ever sought for Sidlesham Churchyard. So, we are now in the process of applying to the Chancellor for a Faculty to regularise what is there, and to seek permission to extend the area to allow additional memorial stones to mark where ashes may be buried in the future.he timing of this coincides with the introduction at Easter of revised Churchyard Regulations, which are intended to make the application for headstones more straightforward, and I hope and pray (but cannot guarantee) that this will be extended to include the Memorial Garden.
One thing that the new Regulations do clearly highlight is that Churchyards are not the same as public cemeteries, and the rules in place reflect that, particularly in relation-to the shape and choice of stone for headstones, and their inscriptions. As a consequence of this, we will need to tighten up on the application of the Regulations in our churchyard, especially when it comes to what is allowed to be placed on graves (and memorial plaques), for example no plastic flowers and ornaments. I know this may be hard for some families, particularly where such items hold personal meaning, but it reflects the particular character of a churchyard as opposed to a cemetery, and we will do all we can to be sensitive in how this is introduced. Once we have received the Chancellor's ruling on our Faculty Application, we will make the new Regulations readily available for people to read.
Churchyards, especially rural ones like St Mary Our Lady, are very special areas. They are places of memory and mourning, of prayer and quiet reflection; places where generations are remembered and where some of the history of our village is captured in stone. It is precisely because they hold such significance that we want to get this right, both in regularising what is already there, and in caring for the churchyard well into the future. I know that churchgoers, and non-churchgoers alike, value the peace and comfort it provides.
If you have any questions concerning the churchyard, do please be in touch. With my continued prayers for everyone in Sidlesham.
Fr ChrisI am Writing this letter at the end of a very hectic couple of weeks. On the first Sunday in May, following our main Sunday service, we held our Annual Parochial Church Meeting and Annual meeting of parishioners; two separate meetings which effectively form a single Annual meeting of the church at which the accounts for the year are presented, the accomplishments of the previous calendar year are celebrated, new PCC members are elected and importantly, new churchwardens are appointed. I am delighted that in this coming year we will be back to having two churchwardens again, and I'm very grateful to Vanessa St John and Carolyn Brading for agreeing to take on these important roles. My thanks to Chris Blanshard, the retiring churchwarden, for her work and commitment over the past two years.
On Tuesday 5th May, following three and a half years here as priest in charge, I was licenced and inducted as Vicar of the parish. It is a great privilege and humbling to be the first incumbent here for over 30 years. It was such a joy to have a church full of people from across the village, to welcome Bishop Will (the Bishop of Lewis) and Archdeacon Father Tom Carpenter to Saint Mary's. Thank you to everyone who helped beforehand and for all who came. As I walked the bishop to his car he commented on what a warm and welcoming church Sidlesham is — I think we should take that as a compliment!
The following Sunday was Rogation Sunday, and I quickly learned that the position of Vicar brought with it no better control over the weather! On the Saturday we set up in glorious sunshine, but Sunday morning was an altogether different story as it poured with rain. I left it as late as I could before surrendering to the inevitable, and announced that the service would be in church after all. However, I was not to be defeated, I was determined that the children would be able to experience the ancient tradition of beating the bounds of the parish, which was to be symbolically represented by the Church Meadow. We had organised for a tractor and plough, lambs, and a lobster pot to be brought to the field to represent three different types of farming in our parish — it would have been a shame not to have been able to make use of them. So, after the service in church, I and over half the congregation made our Way out into the rain and walked around the edge of the field singing a Taizé chant and beating the bounds with sticks. At each of the three ‘farming stations’ we stopped and prayed for those involved in the different forms of farming in our parish. My thanks to the Eades for providing the tractor and lambs and to Daniel Langford for the loan of one of his lobster pots and a rather fine fisherman figure! Overall, I think it was an I effective and fun Way of teaching about the ancient tradition of ‘beating the A r A bounds’ and, judging by the laughter, the children had a lot of fun too!
With my continued prayers for everyone in Sidlesham.
Fr ChrisFr Chris is to be licensed to the Parish as Vicar
on Tuesday 5 May, 7.30pm
This is a time of great joy for our parish as the Bishop of Chichester has reinstalled the living for the parish, which has been suspended for approximately 30 years.
The Service of Licensing and Collation will be conducted by The Right Reverend William Hazlewood, Bishop of Lewes and Fr Tom Carpenter, Archdeacon of Chichester. We do hope you are able to join us for the service and refreshments afterwards in the Parish Rooms.
Easter Sunday at St Mary's this year is one I won't forget. In my letter last month, I wrote about the anticipation that Easter at Sidlesham held this year, including the prospect of baptising l0 young people at the 10:00 service.
In the days that followed writing that letter, I was faced with the challenge to overcome the practical problems that would arise from baptising so many people at one of the busiest services in the church’s year. There was the font, which as most of you will know is tucked away towards the back of church near the north door, with barely enough space for one family to stand comfortably around, let alone five family groups. And then there was the issue of timing; just how long would it take to anoint and baptise all those candidates? As you may imagine I experienced several sleepless nights worrying about these things.
As it turned out, I needn’t have worried; all went well, and any expectations of the day I had, were well and truly exceeded! In the end, I had the privilege of baptising I0 children and 3 parents. We moved the Altar back against the East Wall to make space in the Sanctuary for a table, onto which was placed the inner bowl from the font. The table was decorated with paper ‘Alleluia’ signs which the children had coloured in at the Shrove Tuesday party, before symbolically burying them for the duration of Lent.
Everything took place at the front of church, with the temporary font providing a symbolic and profound focal point for the first half of the service. The candidates knelt at the Altar rail whilst being anointed and then each of the five family groups, including parents and Godparents, entered the Sanctuary while the candidates were baptised with water in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The service concluded with the newly baptised Christians processing out of the church behind the Paschal (Easter) Candle, each carrying their own baptismal candles to symbolise taking Christ’s light out into the world. My concerns (shared by several members of the congregation!) over how long the service would be, proved to be unfounded and, to my knowledge, no one’s Easter lunch was burnt! Each of the baptised candidates told me how much they had enjoyed their day, as did I, and I look forward to Watching them grow in faith in the coming months and years. The hardest part for me was the time it took to hand Write all the Baptism Godparent Certificates!
If you are interested in finding out more about baptism, Whether for yourself, your child, or simply to explore What it means — please do be in touch. I hope to see some of you at St Mary’s on Tuesday 5th May at 7:30pm When, God willing, I Will be licensed as Vicar of Sidlesham by Bishop William Hazlewood.
With my continued prayers for all Who live, Work and worship in Sidlesham. Fr Chris
In the weeks leading up to Christmas and Easter, people will often say to me with a knowing smile, “It must be your busy time.” Occasionally that is followed by the question, “So, which is busier, Christmas or Easter?” It’s a fair question,“ both seasons are full in their own way. But, if I’m honest, Easter just edges it, and not simply because there is more to do, but because there is so much more to experience. For me, it is the most moving, most profound, and ultimately the most joyful journey of the Church’s year, especially when we reach Holy Week.
It all begins on Palm Sunday, as we remember Jesus’ triumphant entry into Jerusalem, greeted by crowds crying “Hosanna!” At St Mary’s, we gather at 10:00am in the Church Hall for a short reading, before processing into church singing All glory, laud and honour, joining the rest of the congregation for the Eucharist. It is a moment of real energy and anticipation — the beginning of something special.
As the week unfolds, the tone deepens. On Wednesday, we walk the Stations of the Cross together, an ancient, prayerful journey that invites us to follow Christ step by step on the road to the cross.
Then comes the Triduum, the great three days that form a single, unfolding act of worship, drawing us into the heart of the Christian story.
On Maundy Thursday, we gather in the evening for the Eucharist of the Last Supper, remembering how Jesus gave us the gift of the Eucharist as he shared that final meal with his disciples. At the end of service, the church is stripped bare, a stark and powerful sign of all that is to come, but before we leave there is the Watch at the Altar of Repose, created at St Mary’s above the Easter Garden. It is a quiet, candlelit space for prayer, recalling Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.
Good Friday begins with an Easter workshop for our children, with crafts and a gentle introduction to the story of the day. In the afternoon, we gather for the Good Friday Liturgy: simple, solemn, and deeply moving, as we stand at the foot of the cross and remember the depth of Christ’s love.
Holy Saturday is a day of preparation and quiet hope, as the church is gradually made ready again. A team of volunteers work their magic with the flowers, and the choir rehearses one last time, ahead of the great celebration to come.
And then, before Easter morning even dawns, comes the Easter Vigil on Saturday evening; without doubt my favourite service of the year. We begin in darkness. A single flame — the light of Christ — is brought into the church in the form of the Paschal Candle, and slowly that light is shared fiom person to person until the whole space glows. We listen to the story of God’s saving work, and then, suddenly, the lights blaze, the Gloria rings out, and Easter is proclaimed: Christ is risen!
Easter Day itself begins quietly at 8:00am with a said Eucharist, before our main celebration at 10:00am, a joyful, full-hearted service which this year will be made even more special as We celebrate the Baptism of twelve of om‘ young people. Easter has always been the traditional time for Baptism, and it is a wonderful sign of new life and hope to see so many taking this step. We round off the day with Choral Evensong at 5:30pm, a fitting and beautiful close to a remarkable journey.
If you have never experienced the Triduum, I cannot recommend it highly enough. It is not just a series of services, but a journey, that dramatically takes us through joy, sorrow, stillness, and ultimately into life and light. It is something to be entered into, not simply observed.After all that, I may well take a day or two of rest, and perhaps even enjoy a well-earned gin!
A warm welcome awaits you at St Mary’s this Easter. But whether or not I see you in person, please be assured of my continued prayers and blessings for you and for your families.
Fr ChrisAs some of you may know, for around thirty years, the legal ‘right of presentation’ at St Mary Our Lady has been suspended. In simple terms, that means the parish was not formally able to appoint an ‘incumbent’ (that is a Vicar or Rector) in the usual Way. Instead, the Bishop appointed a Priest-in-Charge to lead and serve the parish. Over those years St Mary’s has been faithfully served by Fr Allan Jenkins, Fr Stephen Guise and during periods of interregnum, Fr Roger Pullen. More recently I have had the privilege of being Priest- in-Charge, a position I was licensed to in the Bishop’s Chapel-in July 2022, and I began my ministry here in September of that year.
The Bishop of Chichester has recently decided to reinstate the right of presentation at St Mary’s, and following the proper legal process, he and the PCC have invited me to become Vicar of the Benefice of Sidlesham.
In practical terms, this changes very little. I shall continue With my dual roles as National Missioner for The Society and-Parish Priest here at St Mary’s, With the same pastoral and spiritual responsibilities: preaching, celebrating the sacraments, leading the mission of the Church, and doing my best to care for all in the parish and wider community.
However, the reinstatement of right of presentation does give the parish a degree of greater stability and reassurance for the future, and it reflects confidence from the Diocese. I think it can also be seen as a recognition of the good and faithful life that is already flourishing here. I am very grateful for the support, kindness and encouragement Carolyn, Sam and I have received since arriving in Sidlesham three and a half years ago.
There is much to give thanks for at St Mary’s. The pattern of our Worship reflects the inter-generational nature of our congregation, om traditional Prayer Book Choral Matins and Evensong to the very informal Crafty Communion. We have a growing Sunday School and Youth Hub, a faithful and dedicated choir, a talented flower arranging team. Mary’s Place, which offers tea, cake and chat to anyone in the community, continues to be popular and, of course we are blessed with a precious and holy 13*“ Century Church which is open every day.
In short, we are a living parish, which I believe is prayerful, welcoming, and quietly hopeful for the future.
God willing, I will be licensed as Vicar [by the Rt Revd William Hazlewood, Bishop of Lewes, and inducted by Archdeacon Fr Tom Carpenter, at 7:30pm on Tuesday _5th May at St Mary’s. The service will be followed by refreshments in the Parish Rooms. I very much hope that many of you — churchgoers and friends of St Mary’s alike — will come along. It will be an opportunity not simply to mark a legal change, but to give thanks and celebrate what God is doing among us.
Please put the date in your diary!
With all blessings.
Fr ChrisI hope everyone had a joyous Christmas and a peaceful New Year. It always amuses me when l meet people early in January and they say, ‘Happy New Year! Did you have a nice Christmas?’ quickly followed by, ‘Oh, sony. .. I expect you were busy!’ Well, yes, I was ~ but in a good sort of way, and with far less pressure than the many people who have to do demanding and essential work to support our communities over the holiday period. For the record, this year I had a relatively stress-free Christmas. We even managed to eat Christmas dinner on the actual day, and on'Boxing Day I put my feet up in front of a lovely fire and had a look online at how other churches had been marking the birth of Jesus. It didn’t take long before I was distracted by videos of Great Danes doing stupid things and other frivolous posts from across the globe.
One particularly rich vein of humour came from church noticeboards and captions, and I thought I might share a few with you:
- * ‘Lord, help us to be the people our dogs think we are’
- * ‘God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts’
- * ‘Prophecy class cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances!’
- * ‘Tweet others, as you would like to be Tweeted’
- * Don’t let worries kill you. Let the church help’
- * If there's a ‘Highway to hell’ but only a ‘Stairway to Heaven’,
- what does this say about anticipated traffic numbers?’
- * ‘We welcome sinners ~ saints are tolerated!
This last one turned out to be strangely prophetic. As part of my other role, I visited a church outside of the diocese to offer some advice on how they might improve mission and outreach to their community. Before leaving, I looked at their website which promised a warm welcome. I arrived early for the meeting to look around the church; however, rather than a welcome, I was greeted with a firmly locked heavy-duty security gate. At times my job is much easier than others, and you can imagine my first suggestion for improving their community engagement!
But more seriously, I’m sure at least some of you Will have experienced that feeling of disappointment and frustration felt at not being able to look around, or simply sit quietly, in a church that is firmly locked shut. This is something I’m very pleased that visitors to Sidlesham seldom experience; St Mary Our Lady Church is open every day during daylight hours for private prayer, quiet reflection, or to just look around our ancient, beautiful and holy building.
With my prayers and every blessing.
Fr Chris
